The Blame Game in marriage. We all know how to play. We learn the rules in childhood as they are rooted in the earliest stages of our conflict resolution experience. Whether with siblings, cousins, classmates, or neighborhood friends, the idea that “It’s not my fault” is ingrained. Blame (or rather accepting blame) is much like playing another childhood game: the Hot Potato Game. The idea/goal being “Get it out of my hands and into someone else’s hands before the buzzer goes off.” If you remember playing Hot Potato, then that analogy works. If not, look it up.
In marriage, no one wins the Blame Game. If either spouse engages in throwing blame off or onto the other without an ability or willingness to accept blame – both people lose. Growth is stymied and the relationship suffers.
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